Superbetter   Leave a comment

Superbetter is a website designed to help build up resilience. Emotional,  physical, social, and mental. It is a way to stay focused and get better. Enjoy life to the fullest I guess you could say. I am really committed to trying it out and sticking to it. I want to be more productive in my life and feel better.

Lately, I haven’t been in the best shape. I will get sad for no reason and become very unmotivated to do anything. I sleep a lot and some days I don’t do anything but go to work. I tend to get down at myself and mad at myself and I give up on myself extremely fast. It has been an on and off thing for many years but recently it has gotten a lot worse. It makes it hard for me to do what I want on days like that. And I have already seen it hurt someone that I love. And it is obviously hurting me.

They say the first step to fixing a problem is admitting that you have one. I don’t know the cause of my sadness but that doesn’t mean I can’t try to fix it. Stay focused on little goals to work towards big ones. One of the main things that gets me down currently is that I can’t pass my pt test. Which really sucks because for me running can be a trigger for my sadness if I feel like I didn’t do as good as I should have, this applies to all exercise  but it is more prevalent with running. It is very frustrating for me and I keep giving up on myself. I honestly think that feeling like a failure is the main reason that I get sad.

But I need to focus. I will get better. I have people here that support and love me and I will get better.

I’m getting superbetter from depression so I can pass my PT test.

Right now that is what the top of my superbetter profile says. One day my ‘epic win’ will be accomplished and I can move on to a new goal. And hopefully one day I won’t get sad for no reason. I am doing this for me but also for those who care about me. They care about me so I should care about myself.

It is kind of hard for me to post this. Only a hand full of people know about my sadness and even less have actually seen it in person. I don’t want to hide this part of my life. (well not entirely obviously there is a time in the place.) But I want to use this as a little bit of an out let to talk about my struggles and successes. I promise it won’t get too depressing. I’m still a goof ball and I still have good days and I am hoping that my good days become more and more often.

So here’s to getting better.

-An extraordinary no one who is trying

 

 

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Posted November 18, 2015 by Extraordinary Nothing in Uncategorized

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